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PART 1: Warning – This article may be undesirable for younger readers. Please seek the permission of a parent or guardian before reading further. Lately, I’m hearing a lot when it comes to suicide or suicide attempts. It’s getting progressively clear to me, however, that what I’m hearing when it comes to even more often is childhood sexual abuse. It’s everywhere. Some might say this epidemic of childhood sexual abuse is another “sign of the Apocalypse.” After all, the Scriptures declare: “…in the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection, trucebreakers, untrue accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of delights more than lovers of God; having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away,” (2 Timothy 3:1-5). Hmmm…lovers of selves…disobedient to parents…without natural affection…lovers of pleasure…they may even have a form of godliness. Wow. Certainly, with Satan’s track record for hating and murdering children allround history, it’s a pretty good guess that he could have his hand in this current epidemic, too. Epidemic? Perhaps. Based on reported cases, US Justice Department stats disclose that one in each four girls and one in each six boys (2.78 million guys) will be sexually maltreated before the age of eighteen. JESUS: LORD OF THE SEXUAL PREDATORS? The media is filled with stories with regards to childhood sexual abuse involving every one from ministers to siblings. Just this morning, a headline screamed that an Abilene minister was sentenced for sexually abusing a foster child. Though most Christians will likely find rather appalling the stories and stats I’ve lately been pouring over, one thing we cannot forget – one thing that we utterly MUST bear in mind – is that Jesus passed away for sex offenders, too. I know. I know. I cringed as I was reminded of that fact. I recall a man angrily declaring, “I hope there’s an exceedingly hot place in Hell for child abusers!” Even within our prisons, child sex offenders are looked upon as being the worst of the worst. But let’s remember, in most cases, child abusers were once sexually molested, cherished little children, too. The cycle must be broken. I with resolute determination believe that there are numerous God-fearing Christians reading this right now who are engaged in a struggle with personally sexually abusing children and that he – or she (about 60% of male survivors report at least one of their perpetrators was/is female) – needs to recognise that God loves them with an everlasting love and NOTHING may distinguished them from that love. In addition, I am sure that there are scores of readers who were victims of childhood sexual abuse. You need to recognise that there is no shame. You are not guilty. You are not “damaged goods” and God desires to empower you and use the story of your life to give hope or courage to many, a heap of others who have believed the devil’s lies. There is an army just like you – an army looking for leadership – who needs to recognise the way out. Jesus is the WAY, working through you. Lead them out, back onto the battlefield where you may all make a divergence as wounded, yet overcoming, soldiers. The planet is covered with persons like you who need help. Go on and break the cycle. Yes, YOU! To those who are neither sex offenders (who may even disdain those who commit these acts), or victims of childhood sexual abuse (who can not relate to the aroused suffering they are experiencing that is impacting almost each other aspect of their lives), I ask that you read this article, gather the facts, and ask that God would break your heart for both the abusers and the abused. This issue DOES implicate you. According to Ephesians Chapter 6 in the Holy Bible, our battle is NEVER versus people, but versus demonic forces at work in people’s lives. We must see those who injure persons as hurting people. Let us grasp them as we would a child playing on a playground, unmindful to the rabid dog approaching. Do we get angry at the child or run to their defense with prayer, encouragement and counsel? WHAT ONE SURVIVOR SAYS Here’s what one survivor of childhood sexual abuse had to say with regards to her journeying toward victory after being maltreated by a minister in her church: …abuse touched each aspect of my life – emotional, physical, relational and spiritual. I lived with a victim mentality for over thirty years until I learned to be a survivor. I was angry with everyone, and frighted to trust anyone. Shame and guilty conscience became my neverending companions, convincing me that I in some way encouraged the abusers’ advances. I built protective barriers to keep out of the way of loving and being loved. It seemed as altho my body defied me by bringing unsolicited sexual advances, thence getting my own worst enemy. I took revenge versus my body, forcing it to make restitution for it is disloyalty as I smoked, drank, and over-ate my way to untrue comfort. Because adults betrayed and humiliated me, I became rebellious, refusing to submit to authority. I kept intimate relationships at bay for fear somebody I cared when it comes to would learn my secret. Because a lot of of my abusers were “upstanding” members in the church clergy, I couldn’t trust a God who seemed unsusceptible to my suffering and who permitted adults to abuse me. I was scared of that kind of love, so I rejected God and the counsel of the church. I suffered silently for more than thirty years before it became of the utmost importance that I face the issues of sexual abuse in my life. I couldn’t carry the burden and pain alone. I had to face the past, deal with the hurts and learn to live in the present. The “protective tools” I chosen as a twelve-year old mistreated child – anger, bitterness and refusal to pardon – caused me more pain rather than relief, since I longed for love, acceptance and affirmation. I didn’t want to forgive, however, because forgiving my abusers seemed to reduce the signification of the crime and their need for punishment…I felt warranted in my desire for justice… I did not one thing to cause the abuse – it wasn’t my fault. However, I was responsible for my refusal to pardon and my willingness to hate and injure rather than to love using healthful boundaries. I was faulty for judging all people as evil because of the crimes of a few. Refusing to forgive, to receive and receive love and to constructively deal with my anger and fear was hurting me, not my abusers. I had to stop running from my longings for loving relationships. This realization sent me into a fierce battle – a matter of life and death. I felt I was teetering on the ledge of sanity versus insanity by the tips of my fingers, my body dangling above the abyss of despair. I was affrighted of change, but even more afraid of the pain I carried. But I didn’t try to hide from the truth this time. I understood the abuse was so invasive it would be a lifelong recovery process. Just the thought of letting go of the anger and the grief was hard to bear so I prayed…Eventually, God annihilated the pain from my past, but I’m yet learning to deal with the present, which is strongly influenced by my past. DEFINING CHILDHOOD SEXUAL ABUSE Here’s one suitable definition: “Any sexual action initiated by a peer or adult without consent is abuse, including physical, visual or verbal stimuli.” As a rule of thumb, it’s when a person invades the physical or psychological realm of a child or touches them sexually. This invasion results in the child suffering physical and/or psychological damage. I talked with the father of three young daughters who, after watching a pornographic video while his girls were sleeping, hit ‘rewind’ and went to bed. He was horrified the next morning as he walked in on his innocent little girls, still in their pajamas, huddled around the TV, eating Lucky Charms, observing daddy’s (erotic|sexual pleasure|sexually arousing film. Twenty years later, the girls have had multitudes of unnecessary personal, sexual and relational burdens to bear, including teen pregnancy and other psychological issues. Granted, they may have wound up that way anyway, but as I relay that story to you, I cannot support but wonder if we, as a society, aren’t just as guilty of the sexual abuse of our nation’s children as we expose them to all sorts of off-color, even blatantly sexual examples from the immodest fashions of pop-singers to adult sit-coms and sexual content in films and printed subject matter. Children must not have to undertake and procedure the rubbish we feed them by way of the media. We adults are having a hard sufficient time processing all the junk we’re exposed to. Many persons don’t realize that they have, in actuality – by definition – been sexually abused. See, the term ‘sexual abuse’ encompasses a wide assortment of unsuitable actions from so-called “victimless” crimes like voyeurism and indecent exposure, to child molestation, incest and rape. Voyeurism and indecent exposure are often “gateway crimes” that may get started an offender down the path to more severe action. Here’s a myth-buster: Contrary to popular belief, the perpetrators of sex offenses are NOT acting out of sexual desires; their crucial motive is merely POWER. Child abusers may become so demonically oppressed that they give way to a stronghold and begin to seek domination – CONTROL – over others who are easy prey. When one abusive act fails to satisfy, they find themselves wanting more. The acts may often times become so dangerous that not one thing short of taking a humane life will stop the urge. To sex offenders, victims are not seen as being real people, but as OBJECTS to be dominated. A MAJOR SOCIAL ISSUE How pervasive is sexual abuse of children? It’s approximated that there are 60 million child rape survivors in the USA today. Children with handicaps are 4 to 10 times more vulnerable to sexual abuse than their non-disabled peers (Source: National Resource Center on Child Sexual Abuse, 1992). Long term effects of child abuse include fear, anxiety, depression, anger, hostility, unfitting sexual behavior, poor self esteem, tendency toward substance abuse and difficultness with close relationships. (Source: Browne & Finkelhor, 1986). Adolescents with a history of sexual abuse are significantly more likely than their counterparts to engage in sexual conduct that puts them at danger for HIV infection, according to Dr. Larry K. Brown, Rhode Island Hospital. According to Dr. Brown, “These results suggest two things. Abused kids need adequate counseling around abuse issues. A lot of these kids keep re-experiencing the anxiety and trauma for years.” The second issue, he said, is that “most therapy does not address current sexual behavior” and the anxieties that sexually mistreated adolescents experience. (Source: Larry K. Brown, M.D., et al, American Journal of Psychiatry 2000). Did you recognise that, amongst both adolescent girls and boys, a history of sexual or physical abuse appears to increase the danger of eating disorders? Abused girls were more discontented with their weight and more likely to diet and purge their feed by vomiting or using laxatives and diuretics. These girls were also more likely to restrict their eating when they were bored or with regard to emotions upset. This finding proposes that maltreated girls might experience higher levels of aroused distress, perchance linked to their abuse, and have disturb coping. Food restriction and perhaps other eating disorder behavings may (reflect) attempts to cope with such experiences. (Source: Stephen A. Wonderlich, M.D., et al, University of North Dakota School of Medicine and Health Sciences in Fargo, Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry 2000). The secnd percentage on this subject is available to any individual who is interested. Every blessing, Most helpful customer reviews 0 of 0 people found the following review helpful. |
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